4 More Year$! 4 More Year$!
O Happy Day, my moneyed comrades! Victory is ours-- and not just in the Big Race! The Party of Privilege won four Senate seats, at least two House Seats and, tantalizingly, control over appointing the next member(s) of the Supreme Court!! With that in mind, please join me in a rousing refrain of delicious gloating:

Four More Year$! Four More Year$!
Fourteen-hundred-sixty-one more days of priv'leged sneers!
With our tax cuts out of danger and our interests kept secure
We'll dine upon the spotted owl and dance upon the poor!

I invite each of my esteemed fellow pundits to add to this song's verse, as you all know the tune!
Myself, I'll be packing for a well-deserved international cruise. I don't entirely relish the thought of facing all those foreigners, but I hear unpleasantries can be avoided if one doesn't debark.

Chin-chin!

- posted by Alexis Anna Rolles

 
Sing Along with Lotta!
To honor all of the hard-working legal professionals on stand-by, ready in a moment's notice to launch, briefcases in hand, in defense of democracy and freedom and the American electorate, I offer the following anthem. Sing along to a familiar tune!

The suits go marching one by one,
(Hoorah! Hoorah!)
The suits go marching one by one,
(Hoorah! Hoorah!)
The suits go marching one by one
To make sure by whom the election's won,
And they all go marching down
To the Battlegrounds
The lawyers of Election '04.
(Boomsey-boomsey-boom!)

The suits go marching two by two,
(Hoorah! Hoorah!)
The suits go marching two by two,
(Hoorah! Hoorah!)
The suits go marching two by two
To see if a recount of votes is due,
And they all go marching down
To the Battlegrounds
The lawyers of Election '04.
(Boomsey-boomsey-boom!)

The suits go marching three by three,
(Hoorah! Hoorah!)
The suits go marching three by three,
(Hoorah! Hoorah!)
The suits go marching three by three
'Cause Kerry has vowed that he won't concede,
And they all go marching down
To the Battlegrounds
The lawyers of Election '04.
(Boomsey-boomsey-boom!)

The suits go marching four by four,
(Hoorah! Hoorah!)
The suits go marching four by four,
(Hoorah! Hoorah!)
The suits go marching four by four
To prevent mistakes like the one made by Gore,
And they all go marching down
To the Battlegrounds
The lawyers of Election '04.
(Boomsey-boomsey-boom!)

The suits go marching five by five,
(Hoorah! Hoorah!)
The suits go marching five by five,
(Hoorah! Hoorah!)
The suits go marching five by five
Though Bush and Cheney have God on their side!
And they all go marching down
To the Battlegrounds
The lawyers of Election '04.
(Boomsey-boomsey-boom!)

The suits go marching six by six,
(Hoorah! Hoorah!)
The suits go marching six by six,
(Hoorah! Hoorah!)
The suits go marching six by six
Though they say the problems of 2000 are fixed,
And they all go marching down
To the Battlegrounds
The lawyers of Election '04.
(Boomsey-boomsey-boom!)

The suits go marching seven by seven,
(Hoorah! Hoorah!)
The suits go marching seven by seven,
(Hoorah! Hoorah!)
The suits go marching one by one
Because God knows with all those electronic voting machines with no paper trail and no viable course of action for a recount should one be necessary and the shortage of poll volunteers and the long lines and maybe bad weather we'll need all the help we can get and be praying to heaven...
And they all go marching down
To the Battlegrounds
The lawyers of Election '04.
(Boomsey-boomsey-boom!)

The suits go marching eight by eight,
(Hoorah! Hoorah!)
The suits go marching eight by eight,
(Hoorah! Hoorah!)
The suits go marching eight by eight
To fan the fires of this debate.
And they all go marching down
To the Battlegrounds
The lawyers of Election '04.
(Boomsey-boomsey-boom!)

The suits go marching nine by nine,
(Hoorah! Hoorah!)
The suits go marching nine by nine,
(Hoorah! Hoorah!)
The suits go marching nine by nine
But I know Cheney and Bush will be fine!
And they all go marching down
To the Battlegrounds
The lawyers of Election '04.
(Boomsey-boomsey-boom!)

The suits go marching ten by ten,
(Hoorah! Hoorah!)
The suits go marching ten by ten,
(Hoorah! Hoorah!)
The suits go marching ten by ten
And it's "Four More Years!" we'll shout loud in the end!
And they all go marching down
To the Battlegrounds
The lawyers of Election '04.
(Boomsey-boomsey-boom!)

- posted by Lotta Cash

 
More International Support
Hurrah to the international Billionaire! A Sri Lankan businessman has gone one step farther than your average pollster in reassuring us of our President's fate. This morning, every one of Sri Lanka's leading newspapers boasted a full-page advertisement congratulating Bush on his victory in the presidential race. Mr. ASP Liyanage, managing director of real-estate firm ASP Constructions Private, spent one million rupees on the ads, roughly 10 years' salary for the average Sri Lankan.

Don't worry, Mr. Liyanage-- your message may be a bit early, but your fellow Billionaires are doing our damnedest to prove you the visionary you are!

- posted by Alexis Anna Rolles

 
More International Support
Hurrah to the international Billionaire! A Sri Lankan businessman has gone one step farther than your average pollster in reassuring us of our President's fate. This morning, every one of Sri Lanka's leading newspapers boasted a full-page advertisement congratulating Bush on his victory in the presidential race. Mr. ASP Liyanage, managing director of real-estate firm ASP Constructions Private, spent one million rupees on the ads, roughly 10 years' salary for the average Sri Lankan.

Don't worry, Mr. Liyanage-- your message may be a bit early, but your fellow Billionaires are doing our damnedest to prove you the visionary you are!

- posted by Alexis Anna Rolles