Calling All Cars!
[Or private jets, or yachts, or, oh, I don't know... however we're getting around these days!]

If we Billionaires had our own color-coded alert system (and why don't we, by the bye?), I would personally sign the Executive Order to raise it to "orange" or what ever would translate as "come quick!" for I have just had some very upsetting news: one of our own is in serious danger of affluential demotion.

Ken and Linda Lay, those fine, upstanding pillars of Billionaire society, are in trouble of actually becoming [gasp!] mere millionaires! The unfortunate troubles visited upon our Dear Kenny have apparently drained the family's resources to the point of maybe having to give up a few of those fabulous homes, and vacations with the grandchildren may actually have to be restricted to points within the contiguous United States.

If we've ever needed to heed a call to action, this is it, my chickens! We cannot allow our friends to suffer the indignity of such abject poverty - the change of lifestyle on its own just may send poor Linda into shock. So let's rally, troops! I say we start a rescue fund - dig deep, everyone!

- posted by Lotta Cash